What do you do?

[Yuck]

(Etiquette / performance question)

You are on the tee, your foursome huddled behind you in anticipation of a spectacular tee shot. You tee it up, waggle and get ready to hit. All of a sudden you feel the rumbling of last nights bean burrito in your gut. You know what will happen when you swing, so what do you do?

1) Let it Rip (Both the shot and the "wind")

2) Step away from the ball, and tactfully cough, thus masking the unpleasant sound. (Down wind of course)

or...

3) Clench your cheeks, play your shot and find a private spot to relieve the pressure.


I have tried all three methods, but method 1 and method 3 both have produced some pretty foul shots....

[zojo]

everyone hits bad shots no matter what. would you rather be remembered as the guy who hit a bad shot or ripped a** while hitting a bad shot? stepping away would be the best thing to do. another 20 seconds on the tee is better than lifelong humiliation.

[JeffreySpicoli]

I vaguely remember having a conversation like this during my junior high school years.

 

I don't miss those times.

[gatorsteve]

I usually just step back and let it rip, and make sure everyone gets a piece of it.

 

 

 

steve

[Kreth]

I'm not a rules guru, but if you let it rip, isn't there a 2-stroke penalty for playing a hole out of order?

[Dill Pickleson]

ask someone to pull your finger, atleast thats what i do

[hoganfan924]

I knew there was a reason your username was "Yuck!" :russian_roulette:

[JDorfler]

Step away, tell everyone, "Shhh, shh! Listen." Let it rip like as if you are trying for a record. Then announce, "Beat that!"

 

If they give you grief, use your best Shrek voice and say, "Better out than in."

[sambo400 II]

shard

[larrybud]

Well, it's certainly one way to make sure your playing partners don't stand too close to you during your shot!

 

It also gives a whole new meaning to a "stinker of a shot".

[Skaffa77]

Let it rip and ask if anyone heard the random geese flying by...

 

 

If they don't have a befuddled appearance searching for the ghost geese...they'll be on the ground laughing their @ss off...

[grabthepin]

I once discovered using one of those punching bags with digital force display that timing a sneeze to impact would lead to a harder punch. You've got me curious now...

[777twist]

This is the easiest rule question to answer on this whole forum...

 

Simply ask the closest person to get on their knees and insert their finger into your bum, then at the moment of impact they should yank their finger out (it should be in a few inches to work properly) and you will no doubt get an extra 20 yards on your drive.

 

I think this is under the rules section, not the etiquette section.

 

Twist

[thruzek]

Step back, let it rip, then look around and tell everyone it must be those "Rocky Mountain Barking Spiders"!

[steelmonkfruit]

boom the shot and it will cover your other noise. Its bad to have tension in a golf swing.

 

 

Worst case scenario: you try to rip both and miss the ball.

[jjj912]

I'm not a rules guru, but if you let it rip, isn't there a 2-stroke penalty for playing a hole out of order?

 

Actually, that's a DQ. But in this case they might waive the DQ under Rule 33-7 if you promise to not commit further olfactory violations. :russian_roulette:

[Dill Pickleson]

boom the shot and it will cover your other noise. Its bad to have tension in a golf swing.

 

 

Worst case scenario: you try to rip both and miss the ball.

 

i think sharting would be the worst case scenario, that would make for an unpleasant round

[villa]

3) Clench your cheeks, play your shot and find a private spot to relieve the pressure.

Classy topic!

 

Having said that, I recently had the same scenario. I was playing in a corporate event so there was no way I could let it out. It was a short par 4 and I had a 2 iron in my hand. I decided I had to clench and hope for the best. Hit a decent shot down the middle and no-one was any the wiser. The perfect crime!

[Andy_Mac]

the way I see it you have a few options (assuming you are playing with good friends).

 

1. drop a** on your downswing. explain to your group that your instructor suggested that as a way to propel your hips clear.

 

2. move away from the ball and ask your partner if he thinks that is a dent on the side of your club... as he reaches out and pulls the club toward himself hold on to your end and release... "thanks, I needed that"

 

3. my favorite: take your swing and pose at the end. once your pose is set let er rip. keep posing with straight face till the ball hits the ground. once you turn around to your boys who are no doubt laughing their butts off you can have 2 responses...

 

good shot: Thats the smell of victory, gentlemen.

bad shot: that about summed up that shot.

[Merlin_T]

Well, it happened to one of my friend two years ago with relatives! He did it, looked in the sky and said: "Ducks?". Believe it or not, people looked immediatly to try to see them :) :russian_roulette: