Most ridiculous thing heard on the range

[moose557]

Not a ridiculous thing I heard on the range but something that happened to me today. Im Left handed and down wind from the righty next to me. He was absolutely hacking away. Taking massive swings and hitting the ball so fat it wasn't rolling more then 10 feet. To make it worse there was a lot of sand on the range to fix divots. After each of his swings I would eat a face full of sand and dirt. He was either oblivious or didn't care. Had to stop and go practice putting until he was finished.

[roundersmitty]

Behind the range where I visit there is a practice green for bunker, chipping, and short pitch shorts. About 20yrd out I hit the dreaded hosel shot with my lob wedge. It goes about 60 degrees right of target over a small fence bouncing on the sidewalk of a busy street. I couple was walking up to it and the guy caught it as it was bouncing toward him. We got a good laugh. My full swings at the range I never get the sh@#ks...but I am prone to the chip yips once in awhile.

[shakey]

[quote name='TR1PTIK' timestamp='1409257205' post='10026717']
[quote name='shakey' timestamp='1409051654' post='10009375']
My dad said this to me the other day on the putting green:
"I've started putting like Michelle Wie. You know how she bends over when she putts. It works pretty good. Of course, her butt looks better than mine!"
[/quote]

That's the best one so far!
[/quote]
There's virtually no end to the craziness of my dad's comments.

This one became pretty popular at his course for awhile. I joined his group one day and it's constant banter back and forth even when you're hitting. He had a decent birdie putt that came up just short and I said "nice roll." His reply-"Yeah. But I can buy those at the bakery any time."

It took a minute for that one to sink in. All the guys had snickered at his reply. Without thinking I said it too him again a few holes later and got the same response. My sarcastic/abrasive self took over and said "alright smart@$$, I hope u putt the next one off the green!" His group got a laugh.

[DickieThon]

"Are you a pro?" is a question I get regularly on the range.

"No, but I spent a lot of money on these clubs." is an answer I give regularly on the range.

[TrippWard]

Favorite thread I've read so far. Great way to wind up the work day. To add my story:

My back yard has become somewhat of a driving range. Hitting with Dad and grandpa one day having a closest to the hole. We all drank a good 4 or five seven and sevens. Dad goes into the house, comes out and says "I think I'm gunna need to buy some more alcohol...". Grandpa responds, "That was goooooooooood."

[J-Blade]

I posted this a few days ago in another topic on this forum, but it's worth repeating...I saw this yesterday at the range at Van Nuys GC. Three guys were down at the far left hand part of the range, adjacent to a street running up the left side of the range and the Par 3 course. These guys obviously had a "liquid lunch" and had no idea how to swing a golf club. You've seen the type; all arms, no turn, no balance, hit it as hard as possible. Anyway, guy loses his club, it sails over the netting and just misses a car on the street.

[bobfoster]

I can't really remember - it has been a long time since I've "walked the line".

(Older WRXers will get this ... )

[jewofgolf]

[quote name='bobfoster' timestamp='1409883437' post='10067481']
I can't really remember - it has been a long time since I've "walked the line".

(Older WRXers will get this ... )
[/quote]

Where's Jack Pearsall when you need him?

[tembolo1284]

Guys do me a favor, I know what i'm doing.

[Denny71]

I'm porking it but can't play a lick

[ctmason_98]

Sing Along with Mitch.

Only older WRXers will get this.

[TrippWard]

Seen: At range tonight, the pro was closing it down but I had a few range balls in my pocket so he let me go hit em. It got pretty dark so I was hitting with my flashlight on the ball, all of a sudden, about 4 skunks run out into the range and behind me. Made my b-line for the car after hitting my last two balls

[Sean2]

[quote name='ctmason_98' timestamp='1409949384' post='10071815']
Sing Along with Mitch.

Only older WRXers will get this.
[/quote]

He played with wooden shafts.

[pbfoot]

[quote name='DickieThon' timestamp='1409625579' post='10047799']
"Are you a pro?" is a question I get regularly on the range.

"No, but I spent a lot of money on these clubs." is an answer I give regularly on the range.
[/quote]

I've never gotten that exactly, but I do get people asking for swing tips a lot after they see me hit a few. I typically go with "keep your eye on the ball."

[themouth1]

[quote name='pbfoot' timestamp='1410310557' post='10092615']
[quote name='DickieThon' timestamp='1409625579' post='10047799']
"Are you a pro?" is a question I get regularly on the range.

"No, but I spent a lot of money on these clubs." is an answer I give regularly on the range.
[/quote]

I've never gotten that exactly, but I do get people asking for swing tips a lot after they see me hit a few. I typically go with "keep your eye on the ball."
[/quote]

I tell them to swing hard in case they hit it...

[LUMA]

I just hopped into the club and chipped for a half hour today. I heard "I shot 65 yesterday". Looked over at the range to see the guy who said that and was POUNDING away at shots and they were going EVERYWHERE. Chicken wingin, fat slappin, toe smashin, over the toppin, chunkin away.

Nope.

[ShutSteepStuck]

[quote name='tembolo1284' timestamp='1409925338' post='10069517']
Guys do me a favor, I know what i'm doing.
[/quote]

TOMMY K.!!!!

A legandary statement to be sure and one of my all time favorites!

[3_Jack_Par]

[quote name='LUMA' timestamp='1410314629' post='10093007']
I just hopped into the club and chipped for a half hour today. I heard "I shot 65 yesterday". Looked over at the range to see the guy who said that and was POUNDING away at shots and they were going EVERYWHERE. Chicken wingin, fat slappin, toe smashin, over the toppin, chunkin away.

Nope.
[/quote]
Could have been for 9 holes

[BladeBoy]

"Lydia ko played here when she was 14 and was 7 under after 3 holes"

[GHIN n Juice]

[quote name='BladeBoy' timestamp='1410343279' post='10094177']
"Lydia ko played here when she was 14 and was 7 under after 3 holes"
[/quote]

Should have been -8 but her damn caddy misread the green on the par 5 third and her driver lipped out to 6". Had to settle for a tap in albatross. It's tough to find good help these days.

[Cpm881]

A guy trying to help his wife take her first swings at the range with a short iron:

"You have to hit down on the ball to make it go up. Make sure you hit the ground first and then the ball"

This is the only time I ever felt compelled to chime in with some unsolicited advice..... but I didn't.

[Triggs]

A guy on the range with his girlfriend, pulls put the big stick and tops his 1st 2 shots then says 'I don't know what's going on it usually goes 300yds'

[Exactice808]

[quote name='Cpm881' timestamp='1410368166' post='10095903']
A guy trying to help his wife take her first swings at the range with a short iron:

"You have to hit down on the ball to make it go up. Make sure you hit the ground first and then the ball"

This is the only time I ever felt compelled to chime in with some unsolicited advice..... but I didn't.
[/quote]

Ouch.... I can feel the tennis elbow already..... Guess he doesnt hear the excuse "I have a headache".....its "My Arms are tired and I cant[b] grip [/b]things due to this tennis elbow"

[high_draw_1_iron]

Some young gun 15ish year old came up with a friend and set up shot right next to me. His bag is full of i15 irons, and he starts warming up with a high lofted club. Then i hear" I gues now that I'm playing BLADES I just won't be able to hit my 8 from 180 anymore." I can only assume that he was hitting an 8 iron, and I doubt if the balls were going more than 145-150. I was playing 710 MBs at the time, and just chuckled to my self

[BillyZ2]

At the range early this summer and two guys were bragging about their drives going 300+ yards, but weren't anywhere close to that. In fact they were topping, slicing, hooking drives that would probably have gone out of bounds. But the most ridiculous things they said were that they never wore 'cargo shorts', and they never picked up a conceded putt.

[bradley8302]

Get to the course early to warm up. Playing with my best friend, his dad(who is my coworker), and their soon to be brother/son in law. I'd met the guy once or twice so went to say hello and make small talk about his golf game. Guy proceeds to tell everyone he's a scratch golfer. Get to 1st tee and it becomes clearly obvious the guy googled golf terms on the way to the course and scratch must have been first, bc he struggled to hit it last the red tees.

[Fairway Robbery]

[quote name='bradley8302' timestamp='1411439400' post='10166519'] Get to the course early to warm up. Playing with my best friend, his dad(who is my coworker), and their soon to be brother/son in law. I'd met the guy once or twice so went to say hello and make small talk about his golf game. Guy proceeds to tell everyone he's a scratch golfer. Get to 1st tee and it becomes clearly obvious the guy googled golf terms on the way to the course and scratch must have been first, bc he struggled to hit it last the red tees. [/quote]

I recall seeing a definition of "scratch" floating around the interwebs which says: "any player without a handicap"

"He's scratch? Big deal! I'm scratch too!" *shank*

[tesuquegolfer]

[quote name='LUMA' timestamp='1410314629' post='10093007']
I just hopped into the club and chipped for a half hour today. I heard "I shot 65 yesterday". Looked over at the range to see the guy who said that and was POUNDING away at shots and they were going EVERYWHERE. Chicken wingin, fat slappin, toe smashin, over the toppin, chunkin away.

Nope.
[/quote]

Maybe he meant on nine holes!

[shakey]

The guy hitting behind me at the range tonight kept muttering "son of a b**ch" after every tee shot.

[RichardLee]

60yr old white male, proceeds to walk from across approx 80 stalls, to chat it up with 40yr old asian female he must have talked to 2-3 times before

m: "where do you usually play?"
f: "all over...."
m: "i am a member at x, y, z private clubs" (none of which are private)
f: "i dont think those are private..."
m: "your swing is looking great!"

stayed for 30min trying to secure a play date...