Most ridiculous thing heard on the range

[Scooterboy59]

Heard during a demo day when asked about ball flight, " I just hit straight usually about 300".

[Exactice808]

Exactice808,

Saw a guy behaving similarly at Newtown on Saturday. Chuckled to myself when thought about how that behavior would go over on weeknight when several WRX members are there. This same guy "walked the line" spewing horrible swing advice to anyone who would listen. His opening statement to several people was "What do you do?"(presumably for employment)I had only a few left to hit when he got to my far right position on the range and he started up, my response without ever looking up " I mind my own business, you should try it sometime". Needless to say, I was able to complete practice in peace.

 

HAHAHAHAAH..... I heard though there are a couple of pro's (or upcoming pro's that is) up at Newtown that stop in once in a while. Ala Wai has a bunch of characters... but this guy just makes me feel uncomfortable. I mean he hasnt bothered me.... but everytime I see him I feel like this...

 

 

 

Im still trying to figure out WTF is Mayor of the Range.... I just stick my headphones in and pound away..... Dont even want to make eye contact.....

[benden]

What sounded like a very bad 'follow through'...and I'm not talking about post impact....

[roundersmitty]

Not on the range...but this happened on the 1st tee at the local course. Was watching a twosome warm up....could tell that following them would be slow...but my plans were to cut over on a hole and play missing holes later. They were waiting, and waiting, and the group ahead was past the 150y marker on a 475y par 5 hole. The lady starter says, "That white marker is 325y out just so you know, and that group is 350y away." Then the guy warming up on tee says, "I have been known to hit 450". Watched him swing, no balance, clubhead speed about 90. Both guys topped their drive to about 125-150y off the tee barely clearing the red tees. The group ahead was off the green before they hit their 2nd shot.

[bwrichmond]

[quote name='roundersmitty' timestamp='1413202301' post='10277421']
Not on the range...but this happened on the 1st tee at the local course. Was watching a twosome warm up....could tell that following them would be slow...but my plans were to cut over on a hole and play missing holes later. They were waiting, and waiting, and the group ahead was past the 150y marker on a 475y par 5 hole. The lady starter says, "That white marker is 325y out just so you know, and that group is 350y away." Then the guy warming up on tee says, "I have been known to hit 450". Watched him swing, no balance, clubhead speed about 90. Both guys topped their drive to about 125-150y off the tee barely clearing the red tees. The group ahead was off the green before they hit their 2nd shot.
[/quote]

Must measure his game in feet while everyone else is measuring in yards.

[Kratus977]

I was at my Dad's club a few months ago. I was trying to help my Dad figure out what his swing flaw was. I wasn't really hitting balls, just helping out my dad at the range. Our clubs used to be owned by the same company, so I could use either club anytime I wanted.

So, there is a female golfer who plays for a top tier college program at the range. She is attractive, she's very nice (gave my wife some tips on the range, and also told my wife to listen to me about something I was telling my wife about her swing[i really appreciated that cause as some may know, getting your wife/SO to listen about golf tips is sometimes like pulling teeth) and probably gets hit on every time I've seen her at the range.

So, there's a younger guy, probably mid 20's. He's hitting ball after ball, and every time after he hits he's checking her out. At this point, she's sitting on one of the benches on the range texting or doing something on her phone. The younger guy starts to hit his driver. He's maybe hitting 225 yards, but high in the air. You can hear him muttering about how well he's hitting it. The girl gets up off the bench, and is getting ready to hit some more. Her bag is next to the young guy's.

As she's walking to her bag, he says to her - "You know, chicks dig the long ball". The evil look she gave him, was priceless. Then she pulls out her driver, kills one at least 250 yards, and turns to him and says "chicks only dig the long ball when you hit it further than they can". I nearly died laughing, and the young guy didn't stay on the range much longer.

[Jseale]

On the course today. Pushed my layup right and was about 20 ft from being in a homeowners back yard. As I was looking for my ball (there was standing water from heavy rains this week) the homeowners dog (some kind of mastiff) runs up to the fence and makes it clear that he'd like to eat me up. A lady walks outside:

Lady - Did you break my window?

Me (thinking she was joking) - No maam it was those guys. (Pointing at my two buddies in the fairway)

Lady - Barkley's gonna bite your a**.

Me (still thought we were joking) - Oh yeah, he's going to get a mouth full then.

Lady - If you could play golf you wouldn't be in that ditch. Bite his a** Barkley, bite his a**. You suck. Look at you. You're not even using a tee. You pulled your ***&*+! ball out of that #@$**! ditch. Bite his a** Barkley. You're gonna tear the grass up now. Look at you. You think you can hit that ball? You suck. Bite his a** Barkley.

Me - It's way too early to be so drunk.

She kept yelling at us all the way to the green. Pretty awesome. I'm still not completely sure that she wasn't joking.

[Reasonability]

These last few posts have had some gems in them !!!!!

Too bad Barkely and owner have yet to meet the boys who believed chicks dig the long ball. LOL

[Lerdan]

Not exactly on the range, but....

Yesterday, my wife was doing some math with my 4 years old son. There was a picture in the book with a hammer, peace of wood and some nails.

Wife: Son, how many nails are there?
Son: Nails?..... they look like golf tees

[r32]

This is a great thread! Keep the stories coming. [url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/index.php?&app=forums&module=extras&section=legends#"] [/url]

I try not to even make eye contact on the range any more. Had too many guys come over and just chat for my entire bucket while I'm trying to work on my game. I'm a lefty though so it works out well if I play the far left of the range with my back to everyone.

[3_Jack_Par]

[quote name='Jseale' timestamp='1413412712' post='10295215']
Lady - Barkley's gonna bite your a**.

[b]Me (still thought we were joking) - Oh yeah, he's going to get a mouth full then.[/b]
[/quote]
This is a great line!

[Ryanson]

"You got to pull that club down like you are pulling a rope on a bell...just pulll the rope, pull the rope, pull the rope!" -As I just saw him sucking huge as he struck his balls.

[Ryanson]

[quote name='Jseale' timestamp='1413412712' post='10295215']
On the course today. Pushed my layup right and was about 20 ft from being in a homeowners back yard. As I was looking for my ball (there was standing water from heavy rains this week) the homeowners dog (some kind of mastiff) runs up to the fence and makes it clear that he'd like to eat me up. A lady walks outside:

Lady - Did you break my window?

Me (thinking she was joking) - No maam it was those guys. (Pointing at my two buddies in the fairway)

Lady - Barkley's gonna bite your a**.

Me (still thought we were joking) - Oh yeah, he's going to get a mouth full then.

Lady - If you could play golf you wouldn't be in that ditch. Bite his a** Barkley, bite his a**. You suck. Look at you. You're not even using a tee. You pulled your ***&*+! ball out of that #@$**! ditch. Bite his a** Barkley. You're gonna tear the grass up now. Look at you. You think you can hit that ball? You suck. Bite his a** Barkley.

Me - It's way too early to be so drunk.

She kept yelling at us all the way to the green. Pretty awesome. I'm still not completely sure that she wasn't joking.
[/quote]

Yikes!!! But you handled that exchange like a pro.

[Chuck_22046]

The very first time I went to top golf a buddy who doesn't play golf wanted to come along...no problem says me.

So he shows up with this bag of clubs... I think they were one of the rental sets they have. So we're hitting balls having a good time and all then suddenly...

"Dude...something is seriously wrong with this club!"

He is right handed holding a left handed club... I have never laughed so hard in my life. The look on his face was priceless

[JasonFL]

[quote name='Jseale' timestamp='1413412712' post='10295215']
On the course today. Pushed my layup right and was about 20 ft from being in a homeowners back yard. As I was looking for my ball (there was standing water from heavy rains this week) the homeowners dog (some kind of mastiff) runs up to the fence and makes it clear that he'd like to eat me up. A lady walks outside:

Lady - Did you break my window?

Me (thinking she was joking) - No maam it was those guys. (Pointing at my two buddies in the fairway)

Lady - Barkley's gonna bite your a**.

Me (still thought we were joking) - Oh yeah, he's going to get a mouth full then.

Lady - If you could play golf you wouldn't be in that ditch. Bite his a** Barkley, bite his a**. You suck. Look at you. You're not even using a tee. You pulled your ***&*+! ball out of that #@$**! ditch. Bite his a** Barkley. You're gonna tear the grass up now. Look at you. You think you can hit that ball? You suck. Bite his a** Barkley.

Me - It's way too early to be so drunk.

She kept yelling at us all the way to the green. Pretty awesome. I'm still not completely sure that she wasn't joking.
[/quote]

I really wish you could have recorded this!

I might have opened the club face on a 3 iron and intentionally sent some mud in her general direction.

[RandomGolfGuy]

My wife likes to talk crap to me when we go to the range together. She never had the patience for the game when we first started, but she now wants to get back into it. She will join me occasionally when I go practice and she's learned enough to recognize a good swing vs a bad one of mine, balance, alignment, posture. She just will randomly say what was that, or that looked uncomfortable, or That sounded bad lol I like to try different things on the range like many of us do and well i just get a kick out of it bc she helps me get in focus mode on improving my game, or proving her wrong. She doesnt care if i hit my target, if the swing looked bad she will tell me. We all like a challenge lol

[AllForeOne]

My most awkward moment on the range was watching a high school senior having a photo-shoot orchestrated with his mom and sister at a local muni. I got a good chuckle out of some terrible poses with his driver, but I really lost it when he started changing outfits. He went back/forth multiple times between his golf gear and a cowboy hat/vest get-up!

There was a strong debate between the mom and sister about how long to stick around waiting for the "perfect lighting." They were already at it when I arrived, and they were still going when I left 90 minutes later. And that particular course has the worst scenery/views of all the courses in town.

[rbhan12]

"I could beat Tiger Woods."

- JonesScott

[moose557]

[quote name='Exactice808' timestamp='1412107083' post='10213533']
Had an awkward moment the other day....

So there is this older guy on the range he is a regular. Had a bunch of kids hitting and the Ball picker drives by the line, the old man walks up to the picker and loads a basket of balls. The kid stops and says "I'll take one too" jokingly. The old man say, "I am the Mayor of this golf range, smart @$$" The kid the responds with "jeez I was just joking" and then a bunch of muttering ensues between the 2 of them....I swear the old man wanted to fight the kid.... stupid

Anyways I see the older man all the time now, walking around like he IS the mayor of the golf range, cigar in hand and trying to give instructions to everyone and anyone..... creepy looking dude........
[/quote]

Have an older guy like this at the range I use to go outside of Boston. Would show up with 2 large buckets hit nothing but half wedges and I swear would stay there all day walking the line trying to give out free golf lessons. Not just like little tips, but akward wont leave you alone lessons. He would walk the line and stand directly behind you while you hit a couple shots then would walk right up to you and start firing swing advice. Then would ask you to hit shots while he tried getting you to implement his advice, grabbing the club, moving it on path, touching and moving your shoulders if eh felt you were doing it incorrectly. I couldnt believe how many people either humored him or really listened to his advice. I would hit a large bucket while he was still with the same guy he walked up to when I would first got there.

He came up to me one time and did his routine of standing right behind me and I knew he was going to stop me and start giving a lesson. I wasnt rude but barely engaged him and I felt I was making it pretty obvious without being mean that I was all set and just wanted to hit my bucket. After a few minutes he gave up and walked up to the next person and didnt try to help me again outside of that first time.

[Exactice808]

[quote name='moose557' timestamp='1413986091' post='10331951']
[quote name='Exactice808' timestamp='1412107083' post='10213533']
Had an awkward moment the other day....

So there is this older guy on the range he is a regular. Had a bunch of kids hitting and the Ball picker drives by the line, the old man walks up to the picker and loads a basket of balls. The kid stops and says "I'll take one too" jokingly. The old man say, "I am the Mayor of this golf range, smart @$$" The kid the responds with "jeez I was just joking" and then a bunch of muttering ensues between the 2 of them....I swear the old man wanted to fight the kid.... stupid

Anyways I see the older man all the time now, walking around like he IS the mayor of the golf range, cigar in hand and trying to give instructions to everyone and anyone..... creepy looking dude........
[/quote]

Have an older guy like this at the range I use to go outside of Boston. Would show up with 2 large buckets hit nothing but half wedges and I swear would stay there all day walking the line trying to give out free golf lessons. Not just like little tips, but akward wont leave you alone lessons. He would walk the line and stand directly behind you while you hit a couple shots then would walk right up to you and start firing swing advice. Then would ask you to hit shots while he tried getting you to implement his advice, grabbing the club, moving it on path, touching and moving your shoulders if eh felt you were doing it incorrectly. I couldnt believe how many people either humored him or really listened to his advice. I would hit a large bucket while he was still with the same guy he walked up to when I would first got there.

He came up to me one time and did his routine of standing right behind me and I knew he was going to stop me and start giving a lesson. I wasnt rude but barely engaged him and I felt I was making it pretty obvious without being mean that I was all set and just wanted to hit my bucket. After a few minutes he gave up and walked up to the next person and didnt try to help me again outside of that first time.
[/quote]

Always one at each range...... Saw the guy again the other day. Not going to lie, he doesnt seem as bad as some of you guys describe as people engage with him so he must either know plenty people or he gives some decent advice. The Range Pro there doesnt bother with him either so I am guessing he is legitimately connected somehow. But again he just gives me the heebeejeebees......

[JJShanley]

I saw and overheard a 40-something y/o guy chatting up a 20-ish y/o girl on the practice putting green one time. She had a cap with a "Y" monogram. Among other things he asked "Do you go to BYU?" She replied that she attended a school in Connecticut.

[LUMA]

Father fighting with his teenage son. The father was a good golfer with quite a bit of experience I could tell. The kid was getting there as well. Freshman in high school maybe?

Father - You have to blah blah blah blah!
Kid - Dad! I know.
Father - Well you have to get that in your head blah blah blah...
Kid - DAD! I know! You didn't even give me a chance! Geese!
Father - Ok then, do it.
Kid - Ok!
Father - Ok. I'm going to go putt while you work on that.
Kid - Fine.

lol.

[Clintness]

A couple of summers ago I was doing children clinics at a local course, every Wednesday we would take a group of kids out to the course and play with them, giving them some help along the way.
A couple of kids, maybe 13 or so, were hitting some shots from around 40 yards out of the rough. I told them I'd run up to the green and stand where I want them to land it.
I get up to the green, and a much younger child grabs my attention by running across the green, so I turned to let him know not to do that. I must have forgot where I was standing, because next thing I know, I've been struck in the thigh.
The kid comes running up "Oh my god I'm so sorry!"
I told him "what are you sorry for?! You hit it right where you wanted to!" Children's laughter will always be worth the pain.

[double_d]

[quote name='JJShanley' timestamp='1414019034' post='10335253']
I saw and overheard a 40-something y/o guy chatting up a 20-ish y/o girl on the practice putting green one time. She had a cap with a "Y" monogram. Among other things he asked "Do you go to BYU?" She replied that she attended a school in Connecticut.
[/quote]

I love that she said that she said she attended a school in Connecticut rather than saying, "I go to Yale."

My wife is the same way always downplays her family background, schooling, and accomplishments.

Me, I would have totally said, "I go to Yale."

[Chuck_22046]

You're away

[ethanlculver]

I go to college at a branch campus of Penn State University. We don't have our own practice facility so we have an agreement to use another well-known college's practice facility nearby our campus.

Before I begin, I must point out that it is a golf "learning center," so you can take lessons from a pro instructor there and stuff if you want. But we just went there a few days a week as a team for an hour. They have a large putting green with about 10 different holes and a chipping green with three holes and two bunkers. Pretty nice.

Then they have a range....a bunch of stalls with artificial mats and then a separate grass area. We use the grass area.

One day our coach had to leave early for something so about 5 of us players were just there for a while hitting on the range. There is an older man (golf teacher) who works at the place...he uses a walker (although he seems to be able to walk just fine without it) and must be at least in his 70s.

He must have noticed that our coach wasn't there and he started making his way over to the grass area. He watches a couple of us hit shots and then tells us we are all doing stuff wrong. He went on about how we weren't releasing the club correctly and then he said directly to [b]me[/b], "You're the worst at it."

Over the next 10 minutes he came up to us all, grabbed our clubs and started moving them how he wanted, telling us repeatedly to "shake the hand of the man in front of you." Then he would stand back and watch us hit one shot and say, "Nope, I said shake the man of the hand in front of you!" He got very worked up and upset. He would say, "Look, I told you like THIS." (and he would demonstrate with his arms and hands).

He did this over and over again for at least 10-15 minutes, spending time with each of us. I didn't want to be rude so I pretended to comply with what he was saying. It was funny because before he came over I had been striping the ball, and since he started telling me how to swing I was hitting it horrifically. He just said "that's okay, you'll get it."

Eventually he left. We all kind of pretended to listen to what he was saying but I believe he took it too far. However, I later heard from someone that his wife was really sick, and then I felt kind of bad. I'm glad that we weren't rude to him.

I know he is a golf teacher there at the center, but we are just a college golf team that uses the range for practice. We aren't there for lessons. I guess he just wanted to do some good, but he went a little far.

But at the end, before he walked away, he wished us all a great season of golf, so I couldn't be too mad.

[DevilDog]

Went to the range near where I work at lunch yesterday. Lo and behold, a range pro was there. A guy that absolutely was horrible was giving a fairly new player lessons. I mean really giving him lessons. Had the new player trying to swing like the range pro whose swing is beyond horrid. The range pro went to get them something to drink and the new golfer asked me if what he was teaching him was correct. I told him "it could be better". He then asked where he should get lessons. I told him look up Monte Scheinblum on Google. He does video lessons and his philosophy is terrific. Then, his last question was, how do I tell my friend that what he is showing me is crap? I laughed and said, just tell him everyone's swing is different and you have to figure out for yourself. So the range pro comes back all smiley and asks the guy if he had been doing what he showed him. Guy tells him what I said. Range pro says, well if you don't want to improve that's ok with me. Guy says, exasperated, I just don't want to play as badly as you do! Range pro gets all upset and says, I have a 15 handicap! I can play! I about busted out laughing hearing that.

[TheGameChanger]

Some of these stories are hilarious. I've been to the driving range atleast 200 times in my life and never had anything happen. Nobody bothered me or hear anything real stupid.

[timbo08]

[quote name='MrElculver2424' timestamp='1414088452' post='10339599']
I go to college at a branch campus of Penn State University. We don't have our own practice facility so we have an agreement to use another well-known college's practice facility nearby our campus.

Before I begin, I must point out that it is a golf "learning center," so you can take lessons from a pro instructor there and stuff if you want. But we just went there a few days a week as a team for an hour. They have a large putting green with about 10 different holes and a chipping green with three holes and two bunkers. Pretty nice.

Then they have a range....a bunch of stalls with artificial mats and then a separate grass area. We use the grass area.

One day our coach had to leave early for something so about 5 of us players were just there for a while hitting on the range. There is an older man (golf teacher) who works at the place...he uses a walker (although he seems to be able to walk just fine without it) and must be at least in his 70s.

He must have noticed that our coach wasn't there and he started making his way over to the grass area. He watches a couple of us hit shots and then tells us we are all doing stuff wrong. He went on about how we weren't releasing the club correctly and then he said directly to [b]me[/b], "You're the worst at it."

Over the next 10 minutes he came up to us all, grabbed our clubs and started moving them how he wanted, telling us repeatedly to "shake the hand of the man in front of you." Then he would stand back and watch us hit one shot and say, "Nope, I said shake the man of the hand in front of you!" He got very worked up and upset. He would say, "Look, I told you like THIS." (and he would demonstrate with his arms and hands).

He did this over and over again for at least 10-15 minutes, spending time with each of us. I didn't want to be rude so I pretended to comply with what he was saying. It was funny because before he came over I had been striping the ball, and since he started telling me how to swing I was hitting it horrifically. He just said "that's okay, you'll get it."

Eventually he left. We all kind of pretended to listen to what he was saying but I believe he took it too far. However, I later heard from someone that his wife was really sick, and then I felt kind of bad. I'm glad that we weren't rude to him.

I know he is a golf teacher there at the center, but we are just a college golf team that uses the range for practice. We aren't there for lessons. I guess he just wanted to do some good, but he went a little far.

But at the end, before he walked away, he wished us all a great season of golf, so I couldn't be too mad.
[/quote]

Good for you man. You and your pals had a real chance to be a jerk there but took the high road. Just goes to further show you never know what someone else might have going on in life, or why they act the way they do and that something so simple can probably make them pretty happy, like showing a few college golfers some tips on their swing, even if they weren't right.

[goaliescott]

"um, guys, could you all hold up for a minute, I tossed a club into the range and I need to go fetch it...."

sadly enough that was me speaking. I was taking some very lazy swings with a PW to get loose and helicoptered it.

As I did the walk of shame back to my hitting stall, an older guy said "son, looks like you need to get some sunscreen going there!"
"It's not a sunburn, it's embarrassment....."