Most ridiculous thing heard on the range

[Bad9]

[quote name='taylormade_06' timestamp='1388217317' post='8358261']
This guy next to me started moaning that the reason he was hitting his irons bad was because the color of the grips were putting him off. They were blue and black and he wanted solid black instead.
[/quote]

I know at least one guy who would say the same thing and actually mean it.

[schwartz1]

An employee of the course walking down the line, telling everyone that was practicing, to not hit him while
he was out picking up balls. It seemed rediculous when he was saying it, until I saw him and another employee
out there with shag bags, picking up balls by hand and throwing them into a bin on the back of a golf cart.
I guess they were just picking up the balls near the flags, because when they were done, one of them jumped into the
tractor to pick up the rest of the balls????

[Bonesaw]

"an right befar yer club hits tha groun you flip yer hands like'at"

[shakey]

Can't be 100% sure on the wording, but it was something like this:
"Hey der feller, what chu thinking bout when you shoot dat ball like yur doin?"

Glad it wasn't directed at me, cause I wouldn't have really known how to answer.

[strokingforscratch]

I had one this week---I was at the range with my daughter, hitting a few balls---

There was a guy behind me hitting---reverse pivot, casting, etc. followed by the slice, when he did make contact--typical beginner stuff we've all been through. And he's a talker. And older gentlemen walks up to me to comment on the job I've done teaching my daughter (9). I go on to explain that I simply showed her how to take a practice swing, a backswing, and get to a finish position--and just got out of her way. After a few sentences of conversation, it turns out the guy is a four decade pro...
The talker interrupts...pleasantly, I'll add...to talk to the pro.

"I can't figure out why I'm hitting it right. Maybe you can help"
"Sure, here's my card."
The talker ignores the allusion, "Yea..I keep slicing the ball, and I've ALWAYS hit it straight....watch me hit..."
Yada..yada...swing...swing....the pro realizes he's not getting out of there, and to his credit he was certainly more than polite to someone who was obvioiusly soliciting his services for free...
The pro offers a few free pointers, and watches a few swings...and some things correct a bit in short order.
The guy smiles, tells his life story, and then finishes with, "Yea, I took a little time off, but I used to be a scratch golfer..."
The pro smiles back, "Well...you don't have a scratch swing..."

[GWD]

At the range today I was hitting butter fade 4 irons into the 300 yd. net with limited flight range balls. The range only raises the net when they see me coming. It is only 10 feet wide since my shot's distribution is so tight. Anyway....

About halfway through my 500 ball bucket, in the stall behind me I hear a "Unnnh..uh..ahh" loud enough to be heard range-wide. Then after a few seconds it happens again. Fearful that I may turn around and see someone having a bowel movement in the range ball bucket, I nonetheless took a peek.

Some short, severely overweight guy was stretching before hitting just a handful of range balls that he got from somewhere (nothing personal if you fit the description). OK, I figured this won't take long and I go back to hitting.

Then there is a long "Ohhhhhh..unh". Another peek showed he was teeing up the ball for his driver. Actually hitting the driver only brought about a loud extended grunt. OK, he only has a few balls.

This chorus happens about four times and suddenly I hear a harmony of identical noise. His buddy had come to the stall behind him and was going through the same process. The new guy added the wheeze of a 3 pack a day smoker as some sort of personal identification.

I quit and sat down in a chair until they hit their balls and left. It was not quite as bad as a Sharapova / Azarenka tennis match but it brought the range to a screeching (pun intended) halt.

[color=#008000][i]Disclaimer: The description of my performance was slightly exaggerated but the two guys on the range were real in every way.[/i][/color]

[LiveWire]

Do you play for the Tiger's or somrthing, I noticed it on your bag. This is what I said to Tiger on a pratice range just northeast of Nashville TN in the mid 90's not knowing who he was.

[boxerjoe2011]

[quote name='24hrclown' timestamp='1380491048' post='7928791']
Yesterday there were a father, son and what I guess to be a son in law. I overheard the son genuinely complimenting his father as being the only one to "be able to hit it to the trees". I look down the range and it's probably 75 yds past a 250 marker to them. So I keep doing my short little contract drills.

A bit later, I hear, "Wow Dad, you really got a piece of that one. You're hitting it to the woods again!"

I look up and all three are hitting heavy slices to the trees on the right side of the range! I channeled all of my inner power to not drop to my knees in a fit of hysterical laughter. I picked my 9 iron and proceeded to hit 120 yd darts to the flag. I felt better about my game
[/quote]

Sounds like a range at spyglass or poppy?

[strokingforscratch]

[quote name='GWD' timestamp='1389927791' post='8475571']
At the range today I was hitting butter fade 4 irons into the 300 yd. net with limited flight range balls. The range only raises the net when they see me coming. It is only 10 feet wide since my shot's distribution is so tight. Anyway....

About halfway through my 500 ball bucket, in the stall behind me I hear a "Unnnh..uh..ahh" loud enough to be heard range-wide. Then after a few seconds it happens again. Fearful that I may turn around and see someone having a bowel movement in the range ball bucket, I nonetheless took a peek......

[color=#008000][i]Disclaimer: The description of my performance was slightly exaggerated but the two guys on the range were real in every way.[/i][/color]
[/quote]

ROFL...this is...AWESOME!

[towncrier]

not ridiculous but funny. an older guy was giving a lesson to a younger lady next to me. not sure he was a teaching pro as much as he was just a 'friend' of hers. at one point i hear him say: golf is a lot like sex; the more you play and the better you get, the more enjoyable the sport becomes. when they were finished and about to leave, i asked him if he had anymore of those wise analogies. she looked quite embarrassed and he apologized.

[RollingRocks]

[quote name='Tough' timestamp='1379874101' post='7893287']
When people ask me to hit their driver to see if their slice is because of the club...
[/quote]

Hilarious, as if a manufacturer would make a club to intentionally slice.

[RJRJRJ]

[quote name='towncrier' timestamp='1390153744' post='8489605']
not ridiculous but funny. an older guy was giving a lesson to a younger lady next to me. not sure he was a teaching pro as much as he was just a 'friend' of hers. at one point i hear him say: golf is a lot like sex; the more you play and the better you get, the more enjoyable the sport becomes. when they were finished and about to leave, i asked him if he had anymore of those wise analogies. she looked quite embarrassed and he apologized.
[/quote]

C-Blocker!!!

[sheppy335]

Now i know why i have a net and mat i hit into at home. LOL

I do miss the driving range characters but it is also why i went to the far end with no one to hear, plus i suck so i didn't want to get embarrassed.

[title-it88]

Last summer on the range, the electric company was working about 250 yards past the edge of the range when the transformer exploded with the sound of a large bomb. The range was full on both upper and lower decks, and to this day I have never seen more simultaneous shanks and curse words following ever in my life. Even the 70 year old guy next to me let a WTF! go.

[Exactice808]

So there was this hacker at the range....... No really this motha, after every freaking swing was hacking (Coughing). Poor old man. I dont know if it was one of this "swing triggers" or he had a cold but every damn swing.... loud @SS cough.... damn dude get a REEE COOOO LLLAAAAA

That is all

/rant

[playa]

I used to play golf with a guy who would try to make out that his big misses were just slight errors in execution. This guy would hit a screaming low duck hook into thetrees or shank it at right angles then look at us and say "I overcooked that one" as if it were an overplayed draw or fade.

[strokingforscratch]

[quote name='playa' timestamp='1390522103' post='8519651']
I used to play golf with a guy who would try to make out that his big misses were just slight errors in execution. This guy would hit a screaming low duck hook into thetrees or shank it at right angles then look at us and say "I overcooked that one" as if it were an overplayed draw or fade.
[/quote]

I say that, too...but always followed with a wry smile....

A snap hook between my legs and into the parking lot----"Yea..overcooked that a bit..."
A slice that crossed three fairways 90 yards out----"The action was good, but the wind caught a little of that one"
The thin trailblazer "I've been practicing that knockdown...."
Hit a fat 4iron...."Yea...that's my 100 yard flop shot..."

[RJRJRJ]

[quote name='playa' timestamp='1390522103' post='8519651']
I used to play golf with a guy who would try to make out that his big misses were just slight errors in execution. This guy would hit a screaming low duck hook into thetrees or shank it at right angles then look at us and say "I overcooked that one" as if it were an overplayed draw or fade.
[/quote]

Ive got a buddy like that too. He'll literally have 18 terrible tee shots in a row, and say "I know exactly what I did wrong there" after every single one.

[dcr147]

I have three, came from the same person:Background, male, mid 20's, measured club speed at 120+ with driver, distance 300-340, Hdcp 11, NO Short game at all!
1. Said" he was intentionally trying to hit fat shots because he was hitting the ball too far with his irons".
2. The day before the club championship he took 6 buckets of range balls out because " he wasn't sure if he was going to play a draw or a fade in the first round the following morning".
3. Said " he made 5 birdies in 9 holes, scored 41..could only account for how he made 2 of them.

[val]

"I'm in golf for 6 months and my index 10"

[Steven991]

August of last year I'm at the range taking some" me time" so I wont kill my 11 year old son for various reasons. Well the range is packed and I end up in a spot next to some college guys warming up before they play. They look like half decent players and yes one was even sporting the orange and white puma outfit head to toe. They seem to have had a few cold one's in them already and are cutting up and generally having a good time. I don't know about a lot of you guys and gals but I'm fairly protective of my equipment and generally DO NOT let anyone hit my gear especially my driver. I had one of my superfast 2.0's with me that day and the Ricky Fowler of the trio next to me asked me about it and if I like the shaft in it, he's never seen a superfast 2.0 with a black shaft in it. I explain to him I had it reshafted blah blah blah. I watched him hit a few with his R1 and he seemed pretty decent so when he asked me to take a few swings with it I said sure. Very first swing WHAMO he pops it straight up and leaves a huge sky mark on the crown. Looks down at it and tells me that'll wash off...... Seriously

[stiffdogg06]

[quote name='Steven991' timestamp='1390553875' post='8522129']
August of last year I'm at the range taking some" me time" so I wont kill my 11 year old son for various reasons. Well the range is packed and I end up in a spot next to some college guys warming up before they play. They look like half decent players and yes one was even sporting the orange and white puma outfit head to toe. They seem to have had a few cold one's in them already and are cutting up and generally having a good time. I don't know about a lot of you guys and gals but I'm fairly protective of my equipment and generally DO NOT let anyone hit my gear especially my driver. I had one of my superfast 2.0's with me that day and the Ricky Fowler of the trio next to me asked me about it and if I like the shaft in it, he's never seen a superfast 2.0 with a black shaft in it. I explain to him I had it reshafted blah blah blah. I watched him hit a few with his R1 and he seemed pretty decent so when he asked me to take a few swings with it I said sure. Very first swing WHAMO he pops it straight up and leaves a huge sky mark on the crown. Looks down at and tells me that'll wash off...... Seriously
[/quote]

I would've either proceeded to grab his driver and do the same or grab his golf bag and walk out with it.

[Wdwfreak]

This is going to sound like im bragging, but honestly i just have to tell this one because it always happens and always makes me sort of annoyed but mostly i just shake my head.

There is this range that i go to often in Madison, WI because it has heaters and is open year round, but no matter every time i go i can be certain to be near some massive idiot. Eventually while im there i work up to my driver and this guy near me has to stop and stare for a few swings and the response is always the same "Hey why don't ya try swinging a little harder next time hahahahaha" i guess they always think i am swinging out of shoes or something or believe to hit the ball a long ways you need to swing really really hard. in any case its always annoying and it always happens

One more

Busy day at the range near me and every is just hitting and having a good time when really loudly i just "SH*T everyone stop everyone stop!" I was thinking "What in the world?" and then as he finally gets everyone to stop he sprints at least 60-80 yards out and grabs his driver head... i was honestly impressed at the distance he got, never seen anything like it before or since.

[llamont]

Not at the range but while in the grocery store, at the deli counter, I struck up a conversation with the man working behind the counter. The game of golf became a topic of discussion and he told me that he recently just started playing golf (3 months) and that he averaged 400 yards off the tee and was shooting around par for 18 holes. "It's not hard", he said. I just played along with him because it made time fly while I was waiting for my food.

[hebsan]

[quote name='llamont' timestamp='1390578680' post='8523425']
Not at the range but while in the grocery store, at the deli counter, I struck up a conversation with the man working behind the counter. The game of golf became a topic of discussion and he told me that he recently just started playing golf (3 months) and that he averaged 400 yards off the tee and was shooting around par for 18 holes. "It's not hard", he said. I just played along with him because it made time fly while I was waiting for my food.
[/quote]

I used to be able to hit 400 yard drives as well........On Links LS

[ctmason_98]

[quote name='Wdwfreak' timestamp='1390573232' post='8522883']
This is going to sound like im bragging, but honestly i just have to tell this one because I want to brag.
[/quote]

I fixed this for you.

[Wdwfreak]

[quote name='ctmason_98' timestamp='1390595808' post='8525179']
[quote name='Wdwfreak' timestamp='1390573232' post='8522883']
This is going to sound like im bragging, but honestly i just have to tell this one because I want to brag.
[/quote]

I fixed this for you.
[/quote]

No honestly, this doesn't annoy anyone else or happens to them often? i really wasn't trying to brag.

[playa]

[quote name='Steven991' timestamp='1390553875' post='8522129']
August of last year I'm at the range taking some" me time" so I wont kill my 11 year old son for various reasons. Well the range is packed and I end up in a spot next to some college guys warming up before they play. They look like half decent players and yes one was even sporting the orange and white puma outfit head to toe. They seem to have had a few cold one's in them already and are cutting up and generally having a good time. I don't know about a lot of you guys and gals but I'm fairly protective of my equipment and generally DO NOT let anyone hit my gear especially my driver. I had one of my superfast 2.0's with me that day and the Ricky Fowler of the trio next to me asked me about it and if I like the shaft in it, he's never seen a superfast 2.0 with a black shaft in it. I explain to him I had it reshafted blah blah blah. I watched him hit a few with his R1 and he seemed pretty decent so when he asked me to take a few swings with it I said sure. Very first swing WHAMO he pops it straight up and leaves a huge sky mark on the crown. Looks down at it and tells me that'll wash off...... Seriously
[/quote]
There is a saying in Oz when demoing drivers. "You sky it you buy it".

[playa]

[quote name='dcr147' timestamp='1390533797' post='8521061']
I have three, came from the same person:Background, male, mid 20's, measured club speed at 120+ with driver, distance 300-340, Hdcp 11, NO Short game at all!
1. Said" he was intentionally trying to hit fat shots because he was hitting the ball too far with his irons".
2. The day before the club championship he took 6 buckets of range balls out because " he wasn't sure if he was going to play a draw or a fade in the first round the following morning".
3. Said " he made 5 birdies in 9 holes, scored 41..could only account for how he made 2 of them.
[/quote]
Winner! Intentionally hitting fat shots lol.

[SurfinTurf]

[quote name='playa' timestamp='1390622677' post='8527659']
[quote name='Steven991' timestamp='1390553875' post='8522129']
August of last year I'm at the range taking some" me time" so I wont kill my 11 year old son for various reasons. Well the range is packed and I end up in a spot next to some college guys warming up before they play. They look like half decent players and yes one was even sporting the orange and white puma outfit head to toe. They seem to have had a few cold one's in them already and are cutting up and generally having a good time. I don't know about a lot of you guys and gals but I'm fairly protective of my equipment and generally DO NOT let anyone hit my gear especially my driver. I had one of my superfast 2.0's with me that day and the Ricky Fowler of the trio next to me asked me about it and if I like the shaft in it, he's never seen a superfast 2.0 with a black shaft in it. I explain to him I had it reshafted blah blah blah. I watched him hit a few with his R1 and he seemed pretty decent so when he asked me to take a few swings with it I said sure. Very first swing WHAMO he pops it straight up and leaves a huge sky mark on the crown. Looks down at it and tells me that'll wash off...... Seriously
[/quote]
There is a saying in Oz when demoing drivers. "You sky it you buy it".
[/quote]

Are you an Aussie, Playa??

East or West coast?